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In particular (and this is a good example of your obsession) the story you told of the girl in the church with her boyfriend and the way she was smiling at you and giving mixed signals, etc. (The way you observed and committed to memory every little detail of her movements is what I mean about your obsessive watching and ruminating about these women.

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***QUESTION***

"David,

I am a 39 year old guy and am still single because of a lot of personal problems I went thru in the early and mid 1990s (nothing too serious--wasn't arrested, didn't go bankrupt, wasn't psycho, etc). Now that all of this is in the past, I've been venturing out into the dating scene again. As I'm more serious about finding a relationship, I prefer women in their 30s and early 40s. My question is this: Do you think that the "cocky and funny" routine works on women in their 30s and 40s too? It seems to me that women of this age group who are divorced/single do not want to play games as much. I'm not looking to play games either.

Or should I take a modified approach to cocky/funny?

Thanks,

Dating in Chicago"

***MY COMMENTS***


You're using the word "games" here to describe the cocky/funny attitude, and I think that we're mixing up our definitions and associations. When I think of "games" as the term relates to men, women, and dating, I think of things like lying, cheating, and manipulation (in the negative sense).

Cocky and funny is a fun, attractive attitude that is VERY attractive in general - to women of all ages.

And yes, women that are in their 30s and early 40s love it.

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